January 10, 1992

GAY PEOPLE'S CHRONICLE

Page 17

This space has been donated to the Racism Forum by the Chronicle, and does not necessarily reflect the views of the Chronicle stuff or manage-

ment.

by Frank Lowery

Who am I?

I spend too much of my time trying to figure out people's motives. What do they want or expect from me? Are they the friends they claim to be? How far do I let them into my life? How long before they "dis" or "dish" me?

On the other hand, there are some people out there who seem to think they know all about me. Enough, at least, to make the statement "That's not like you" when my behavior doesn't fall into their preconceived pattern.

What is my point? Just this: Sometimes we can all be a little presumptuous in relationships. Don't assume that others share your comfort level. Think about what you're saying and, even more so, how it might be interpreted.

As an example, let me tell you about an incident that happened to me about a week ago. I was having a discussion with some friends concerning the visibility of educated African-American gay men in Cleveland. During the discussion, one of my friends (Caucasian) commented that he was surprised at my interest since it seemed to him that most of my time was spent in a predominately white environment. I fit into "the group" (meaning I can mainstream) so well he didn't really think of me as being black.

He thought this was a compliment, but it troubled me deeply. This is the same kind of thinking that surfaces when I'm standing with a group of Caucasians and.

someone in the group uses the word "nigger." During the flurry of apologies, I can always count on hearing, “I don't mean you, you're different," or, "there are white niggers, too, you know" (as though either would excuse their ignorance). Is it also the same thinking that prompts a "friend" to tell me a derogatory racial joke (Oops, are there any other kind?) because they know I won't be upset by it! This is not the first time I have been in this situation; it probably won't be the last. At any rate, it got me to thinking...

Would I be correct in assuming that because I have an education and a decent handle on the English language that it has somehow allowed me to transcend racial barriers? Does it make me any less of an African-American because I'm educated? Absolutely not! What is apparent to me is that regardless of the level of achievement I reach, I will still be judged by most people as an African-American first. I don't have a problem with this, I just want people to realize that, although it is nice to be included in the group, I don't need (or want) to be if it means sacrificing my individuality and ethnic background.

When you deal with me on a regular basis, you learn that I always treat you as an individual. I don't look at color, but I am aware of it-I have to be because there are still too many people out there making color an issue. In order to accept me, you shouldn't need to "whitewash" me or make me a generic friend. There is so much cultural diversity around us, but by trying to pigeonhole people we destroy it.

Although you shouldn't have to watch everything you say to me (or anyone for that matter), you should always think before you speak. Just be aware that if you cross that line you will get "read."

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This space has been donated to Emmanuel MCC by the Chronicle, and does not necessarily reflect the views of the Chronicle.staff or manage-

ment.

by Roger

Happy New Year, gay and lesbian Cleveland!

Another year has come and gone. Many thoughts race through the mind during holiday times, and hopefully yours are pleasant ones. What can we have in store for us 1992? The future isn't ours to see, but how about a glimpse of a time lot of us would like to see?

First on the list would be a complete cure and any future prevention of AIDS. I'm sure that I am not alone in saying I went to too many funerals last year, and had too many confessions from friends who may have contracted it. This is one disease that knows no prejudice, doesn't discriminate due to age, or choose someone based on gender. Here's to a year a great medical breakthroughs, for this and other life threatening illness.

Another dream is united lesbian-gay community, where we all are welcome every-where despite color or gender. Entrances to a function or business should be a choice, 'not a forced restriction. Divided we fall, united we stand. I prefer to stand, thank you. Maybe when we show that we love our neighbors, they'll allow us to love each other as well, without judgements. I had a friend ask me around Christmas if it would accepted legally, with a marriage certificate, for him and his partner to get married, and let the world know their love for each other. I wish I could have told

respected in that Union by everyone around us!" Her's to that being a common reality some day soon, instead of an exception. We have a long road ahead of us as gays and lesbians. Our lifestyle, due to the AIDS epidemic has thrust us into the spotlight more and more, even against our wills in some instances. Closets have been opened in the past few years many preferred closed.

Even with that, one of the biggest doors that has remained closed to us as gays and lesbians that is opening more and more is the door leading to the church. Too often we get caught up in the trials of the world to really sit down and

appreciate what we do have, and that's a home to go to when it's needed. What a revelation, that God's doors never close on anyone, despite any reason, and all that's needed is for someone, anyone, to open them up. God loves all of us, and those of you in our community who have been told otherwise, have never been introduced to God. But that is only something that you as an individual can realize. You must open the doors to Gos, and you must open your soul to accept the Holy Ghost. It must really come from your heart to feel it. If your heart is ready to open to God, or want the chance to try your faith, but don't know where to turn, Emmanuel Metropolitan Community Church is an open door to the gay and community. Our doors open on Sundays for our 10:45 a.m. worship service, and on Wednesdays, for our 7:00p.m. time of privacy or Christian talk. Call or come on in through those doors anytime. You'll be glad you did, and let's make it a record year for our gay and lesbian community. Through the Grace of God, we will be

united for one cause, and the freedom to make our choices.

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